This is a great article entitled, "Lowering the Bar: When bad mothers give us hope". It speaks to me about the very subjects that I blog about here. The author writes, "Today, women no longer need to escape their families to work or be happy—now they need to escape their own unrealistic expectations of what a good mother is." And, "Haven't millions of years of evolution already determined that the vast bulk of mothers would sever their heads with an ax to protect their offspring? Enough. If you love your kids and are doing your best, if they are alive, safe, and sane, then your mind should simply be at ease." There you have it. My goal for the next week is to stop my whinin', do my best to love and care for my kids, and put my mind at ease.
http://www.newsweek.com/id/237526?obref=obinsite
Friday, May 14, 2010
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
Birthday Week
His baseball season also started last week. The first game was on his birthday (Thursday). His team lost 21-0. The league has a 7-run/inning rule, so the opposing team scored 7 runs in three different innings. Gregory's been doing some pitching (this is the first year of kid-pitch, rather than coach-pitch), and it's surprisingly stressful for me. It's really hard to watch him out on the mound, doing his very best, and struggling. After the first game, the boys were all disappointed and frustrated.
The second game came on Saturday (the morning of Gregory's afternoon birthday party). In this game, the teams were much more evenly matched. Gregory's team scored a couple of runs in the first inning, and I knew it was going to be a better game. Gregory pitched the third and sixth innings. His team went into the final (sixth) inning with a 6-5 lead. The inning started with an out, a walk, and a hit. Gregory then walked the next two batters to load the bases. I watched Gregory's posture fall after the second walk, but then he stood up straight, looked at Gary for encouragement, and proceeded to strike out the last two batters, and preserve the win! It was much-needed for this group of boys who had lost 21-0 just two days before! Gregory and his team were happy! I was happy too, but my nerves were shot! :)
Gregory had his birthday party Saturday afternoon. He invited six friends to a local park for a Star Wars party. He asked them all to bring light sabers, and most of the party was spent in an elaborate battle that Gregory planned and I didn't totally understand. We had chips and Caprisuns and the aforementioned cookie cake. It was cheap and easy, and I think everyone had a great time. I know that the morning's baseball win contributed to the festive mood of the whole day.
Birthday Week was, for me, a microcosm of the joys and challenges of being a parent! :)
Monday, May 10, 2010
The Amazing Race
I was disappointed in last night's finale. It started on a sour note, with Jordan being a jerk at the airport, and ended on a sour note with a stupid fight between Caite and Brandy. Frankly I thought the whole episode was kind of boring. The first team off the plane kept the lead the whole time. I'm not sure why they didn't have a detour (picking between two tasks) this week. Choosing the right detour can sometimes make or break a team's chances. Detours can allow some teams to surge ahead or give other teams a chance to make up some ground. None of that happened last night. In the end, I was glad that Brent and Caite didn't win, but bummed that it wasn't the cowboys. I think it was Jet who said that there are some things that are more important than money, and that he and Cord played with integrity and can leave the race with their heads held high. Money can't buy intelligence or honesty or humility or charm. Here's to you, Oklahoma cowboys, for already possessing the important skills in life that make you real, likable people! (And thanks, too, for reminding us of phrases like, "It's on like Donkey Kong.", "Oh my gravy!" and "Dag gummit!")
Thursday, May 06, 2010
LOST
There are several things that I’ve mentioned being worried about that came true this week.
1) Jin and Sun’s story came to a tragic end. I’ve been afraid for awhile that they would not see a happy ending. At least they were reunited and died together. I was afraid that they were never going to find each other again.
2) Flocke’s big plan was not to get all the candidates together to leave, but rather to gather them up to get rid of them. It seems obvious now, but I think the fact that it was very hard to tell who was good and who was evil, gave us hope that maybe MIB was actually going to help the Losties. Do you agree?
3) Kate is expendable. I’ve been afraid that the fact that her name is already crossed off means that she will never make it off the island. And here’s where I’ll mention the theory of a friend of a friend:. In the last episode, “The Last Recruit”, we see Sawyer questioning Kate in the LAPD station. The scene opens with Sawyer walking through the hall eating an apple. When he gets to Kate, he says, “Want an apple?” So, the theory is that Sawyer and Kate are our Adam and Eve on the island. I think it’s brilliant, and I wished I’d caught it myself. What do you think? It makes me sad, though. I would love for the two of them to make it off the island. I’m also sad about the “expendable” nature of Kate, because I feel like it belittles her entire character. I’m afraid that her main purpose on the show has been to manipulate Jack and Sawyer into doing or not doing certain things. (Like when Ben set up for Sawyer and Kate to get in on in the cages, and for Jack to see. Ben used Kate to manipulate Jack into performing Ben’s operation.) Kate used to be a tough character with a lot of depth, but lately she seems like a pawn, and unnecessary, and that makes me sad. As Sawyer said this week, “Your name was crossed out. He doesn’t need you, Kate.”
The Jack and Desmond Show
In thinking about why Desmond hit Locke with his car, in Sideways world, I mentioned that I thought he did it to bring Locke and Jack together (kind of like how he took Claire to Ilana’s office to connect with Jack). In response, Karon commented that she thought Desmond was providing Locke with a near-death experience, so that he would remember. Desmond’s and Charlie’s near-death experiences enlightened them. If it worked for Locke, what experience did he have? What does he remember? In the hospital this week, his machine was beeping, just like the computer beep in the hatch, and in his sleep, Locke said, “Push the button.” and “I wish you had believed me.” It seems that Desmond is doing two things, 1) Bringing people together (or providing near-death experiences), so that they can 2) remember their lives on the island. In this week’s episode, we see Jack becoming enlightened and starting to sense the significance of the connections between those who came to LA on Oceanic Flt. 815.
This week, on the island (or in the sub), Sayid told Jack that Desmond was in the well. Sayid told Jack that he would need Desmond, because “It’s going to be you, Jack.” So, in Sideways world, we see Desmond getting the players in place, and Jack putting the pieces together, which seems to me to be a reflection (!) of what’s happening (or about to happen) on the island.
BTW, in the last episode, The Last Recruit, Sun got shot and had what we can assume to be a near-death experience. When she was being wheeled into the hospital on the stretcher, Locke was also being taken into the hospital on the stretcher next to her. She saw him and said, “Oh No.” and “It’s him.” What does she remember from her flashes back to island life?
FLocke is a Lying SOB
We learned (or confirmed) this week that just about everything that Flocke says is a lie. He told Jack that he could kill him anytime, but good ole enlightened Jack figured out the truth. Flocke is not “allowed” to kill the candidates. He has to figure out a way to get them to kill each other.
I can’t quite figure out what was going on with the plane and the C4. Flocke took the watch off the dead guy before he entered the plane and found the bomb. If Flocke didn’t know there was C4, then why would he take the watch? Maybe he did know. Here are some possible explanations:
1) Sayid planted the bomb for Flocke at some point while he was MIA (shutting down the power to the fence).
2) When Flocke was Smokey, setting the prisoners free, he did a lot of flashing. Could he have been scanning the minds of Widmore’s people, and learning about the explosives?
3) It was all just a big coincidence.
What do you think?
I thought it was very interesting that Flocke came out of the plane and proceeded to explain his very own plan for the fate of the Losties, but pretended that he was describing Widmore’s plan. It was Flocke who wanted them all in one place, so he could kill them. That makes me think that the C4 is his.
One thing I really don’t understand is Flocke’s psychic powers. There are times when he seems like he’s all-knowing and can read people’s minds (Not when he’s flashing as Smokey, but just talking to people as Flocke). There are other times, though, when he doesn’t. I mentioned before that I wondered why he didn’t know that Jin had been taken from his camp, when he was off trying to get Sun to join him. Also, why didn’t he know whether Sayid had killed Desmond or not? But then this week, he knew that some of the Losties had made it off the sub. How did he know that?
What Did Sayid Know?
I’m curious. He seems to know that Flocke brought him back to life. He knows that Jack’s the One. I wonder if Sayid planted the C4 in the airplane. Did Flocke ask him to explain to the Losties how to pull the cords out to “stop” the bomb? Was he in on Flocke’s plan to get rid of them? Did Sayid come to the realization that the only way to be with Nadia was to die? What do you think?
Let’s Get the Daddy Stories Straight
Did you notice that the song playing on the music box that Claire had from her father was, “Catch a Falling Star”? In Season 1’s Raised by Another, Claire asks the adoptive parents if they will sing that song to the baby. She describes it as the song her father sang to her. In this week’s episode, Claire told Jack that she’d never met her father. Maybe the stories are different in the Sideways world, or maybe the characters are looking at things from a different perspective. There’s a huge emphasis on reflection in the Sideways world. We're missing a very important piece of information about what reality we’re seeing in the Sideways flashes. What do you think it is?
The situation between Locke and his father is similar. Did they have a genuinely good relationship before Locke crashed the plane, or had they just not gotten to the point where Anthony Cooper would reject Locke? Maybe he just hadn’t been given the chance to reveal himself as the con man he is – the Anthony Cooper who is being hunted by Detective Ford. If he is the same man, I guess we can assume that Sawyer will never find him and ruin his own life by getting revenge.
Other Random Thoughts and Questions
*How did Widmore get the list of candidates’ names? Why are Claire and Kate crossed off the wheel and the cave wall? Is it because they are women?
*Poor Hurley! When he broke down on the beach at the end, I lost it! I felt so badly for him. It was his rouge call to go talk to Locke that led to FLocke's being able to put his plan in motion. He told Richard that Jacob told him to go to Locke, but he told Jack that he had made that up. It was so good to see him taking a leadership role, and gaining confidence. I wish that things hadn’t ended so badly. I can’t quite get my brain around the series of events that led Hurley to suggest going to Locke instead of going with Richard straight to the plane. What are your thoughts on that? Is there something significant in the process that led Hurley to the decision to connect with Locke? I feel like I must be missing something.
*My friend, Steve, is convinced that the story line in the Sideways world will culminate with Aaron’s birth, and that we will have an “aha” moment when it does. (The "aha" part is my word, not Steve's! ) I think it’s a really good theory. I think that Aaron, Jacob and the boy in the jungle all look a lot alike. There’s got to be a connection.
*I’m so curious as to how the Island World and Sideways World will resolve themselves to each other. I was really sad that Jin and Sun died this week, but there was part of me that knew that they were still alive in LA. Will there be a difference for those in the Sideways LA who haven’t died on the island, than for those who have?
*The previews for next week’s episode showed MIB and Jacob playing a game. Could the black/white, good/evil nature of this come down to who won that game? There are two ways I can envision the game determining the outcome: 1) They played for who would be the force of good and who would be the force of evil. 2) As white (Jacob) and black (MIB) they played to see who would control the island. Maybe Jacob won that game, and was then able to keep MIB trapped, for as long as he was alive. It all smells like some kind of deal with the devil, but I haven’t quite figured that one out yet. I guess we’ll find out next week!
Ok. that's it for now. I tried to get this one out as quickly as I could. If I think of more stuff, I'll add it. Let me know your thoughts!
1) Jin and Sun’s story came to a tragic end. I’ve been afraid for awhile that they would not see a happy ending. At least they were reunited and died together. I was afraid that they were never going to find each other again.
2) Flocke’s big plan was not to get all the candidates together to leave, but rather to gather them up to get rid of them. It seems obvious now, but I think the fact that it was very hard to tell who was good and who was evil, gave us hope that maybe MIB was actually going to help the Losties. Do you agree?
3) Kate is expendable. I’ve been afraid that the fact that her name is already crossed off means that she will never make it off the island. And here’s where I’ll mention the theory of a friend of a friend:. In the last episode, “The Last Recruit”, we see Sawyer questioning Kate in the LAPD station. The scene opens with Sawyer walking through the hall eating an apple. When he gets to Kate, he says, “Want an apple?” So, the theory is that Sawyer and Kate are our Adam and Eve on the island. I think it’s brilliant, and I wished I’d caught it myself. What do you think? It makes me sad, though. I would love for the two of them to make it off the island. I’m also sad about the “expendable” nature of Kate, because I feel like it belittles her entire character. I’m afraid that her main purpose on the show has been to manipulate Jack and Sawyer into doing or not doing certain things. (Like when Ben set up for Sawyer and Kate to get in on in the cages, and for Jack to see. Ben used Kate to manipulate Jack into performing Ben’s operation.) Kate used to be a tough character with a lot of depth, but lately she seems like a pawn, and unnecessary, and that makes me sad. As Sawyer said this week, “Your name was crossed out. He doesn’t need you, Kate.”
The Jack and Desmond Show
In thinking about why Desmond hit Locke with his car, in Sideways world, I mentioned that I thought he did it to bring Locke and Jack together (kind of like how he took Claire to Ilana’s office to connect with Jack). In response, Karon commented that she thought Desmond was providing Locke with a near-death experience, so that he would remember. Desmond’s and Charlie’s near-death experiences enlightened them. If it worked for Locke, what experience did he have? What does he remember? In the hospital this week, his machine was beeping, just like the computer beep in the hatch, and in his sleep, Locke said, “Push the button.” and “I wish you had believed me.” It seems that Desmond is doing two things, 1) Bringing people together (or providing near-death experiences), so that they can 2) remember their lives on the island. In this week’s episode, we see Jack becoming enlightened and starting to sense the significance of the connections between those who came to LA on Oceanic Flt. 815.
This week, on the island (or in the sub), Sayid told Jack that Desmond was in the well. Sayid told Jack that he would need Desmond, because “It’s going to be you, Jack.” So, in Sideways world, we see Desmond getting the players in place, and Jack putting the pieces together, which seems to me to be a reflection (!) of what’s happening (or about to happen) on the island.
BTW, in the last episode, The Last Recruit, Sun got shot and had what we can assume to be a near-death experience. When she was being wheeled into the hospital on the stretcher, Locke was also being taken into the hospital on the stretcher next to her. She saw him and said, “Oh No.” and “It’s him.” What does she remember from her flashes back to island life?
FLocke is a Lying SOB
We learned (or confirmed) this week that just about everything that Flocke says is a lie. He told Jack that he could kill him anytime, but good ole enlightened Jack figured out the truth. Flocke is not “allowed” to kill the candidates. He has to figure out a way to get them to kill each other.
I can’t quite figure out what was going on with the plane and the C4. Flocke took the watch off the dead guy before he entered the plane and found the bomb. If Flocke didn’t know there was C4, then why would he take the watch? Maybe he did know. Here are some possible explanations:
1) Sayid planted the bomb for Flocke at some point while he was MIA (shutting down the power to the fence).
2) When Flocke was Smokey, setting the prisoners free, he did a lot of flashing. Could he have been scanning the minds of Widmore’s people, and learning about the explosives?
3) It was all just a big coincidence.
What do you think?
I thought it was very interesting that Flocke came out of the plane and proceeded to explain his very own plan for the fate of the Losties, but pretended that he was describing Widmore’s plan. It was Flocke who wanted them all in one place, so he could kill them. That makes me think that the C4 is his.
One thing I really don’t understand is Flocke’s psychic powers. There are times when he seems like he’s all-knowing and can read people’s minds (Not when he’s flashing as Smokey, but just talking to people as Flocke). There are other times, though, when he doesn’t. I mentioned before that I wondered why he didn’t know that Jin had been taken from his camp, when he was off trying to get Sun to join him. Also, why didn’t he know whether Sayid had killed Desmond or not? But then this week, he knew that some of the Losties had made it off the sub. How did he know that?
What Did Sayid Know?
I’m curious. He seems to know that Flocke brought him back to life. He knows that Jack’s the One. I wonder if Sayid planted the C4 in the airplane. Did Flocke ask him to explain to the Losties how to pull the cords out to “stop” the bomb? Was he in on Flocke’s plan to get rid of them? Did Sayid come to the realization that the only way to be with Nadia was to die? What do you think?
Let’s Get the Daddy Stories Straight
Did you notice that the song playing on the music box that Claire had from her father was, “Catch a Falling Star”? In Season 1’s Raised by Another, Claire asks the adoptive parents if they will sing that song to the baby. She describes it as the song her father sang to her. In this week’s episode, Claire told Jack that she’d never met her father. Maybe the stories are different in the Sideways world, or maybe the characters are looking at things from a different perspective. There’s a huge emphasis on reflection in the Sideways world. We're missing a very important piece of information about what reality we’re seeing in the Sideways flashes. What do you think it is?
The situation between Locke and his father is similar. Did they have a genuinely good relationship before Locke crashed the plane, or had they just not gotten to the point where Anthony Cooper would reject Locke? Maybe he just hadn’t been given the chance to reveal himself as the con man he is – the Anthony Cooper who is being hunted by Detective Ford. If he is the same man, I guess we can assume that Sawyer will never find him and ruin his own life by getting revenge.
Other Random Thoughts and Questions
*How did Widmore get the list of candidates’ names? Why are Claire and Kate crossed off the wheel and the cave wall? Is it because they are women?
*Poor Hurley! When he broke down on the beach at the end, I lost it! I felt so badly for him. It was his rouge call to go talk to Locke that led to FLocke's being able to put his plan in motion. He told Richard that Jacob told him to go to Locke, but he told Jack that he had made that up. It was so good to see him taking a leadership role, and gaining confidence. I wish that things hadn’t ended so badly. I can’t quite get my brain around the series of events that led Hurley to suggest going to Locke instead of going with Richard straight to the plane. What are your thoughts on that? Is there something significant in the process that led Hurley to the decision to connect with Locke? I feel like I must be missing something.
*My friend, Steve, is convinced that the story line in the Sideways world will culminate with Aaron’s birth, and that we will have an “aha” moment when it does. (The "aha" part is my word, not Steve's! ) I think it’s a really good theory. I think that Aaron, Jacob and the boy in the jungle all look a lot alike. There’s got to be a connection.
*I’m so curious as to how the Island World and Sideways World will resolve themselves to each other. I was really sad that Jin and Sun died this week, but there was part of me that knew that they were still alive in LA. Will there be a difference for those in the Sideways LA who haven’t died on the island, than for those who have?
*The previews for next week’s episode showed MIB and Jacob playing a game. Could the black/white, good/evil nature of this come down to who won that game? There are two ways I can envision the game determining the outcome: 1) They played for who would be the force of good and who would be the force of evil. 2) As white (Jacob) and black (MIB) they played to see who would control the island. Maybe Jacob won that game, and was then able to keep MIB trapped, for as long as he was alive. It all smells like some kind of deal with the devil, but I haven’t quite figured that one out yet. I guess we’ll find out next week!
Ok. that's it for now. I tried to get this one out as quickly as I could. If I think of more stuff, I'll add it. Let me know your thoughts!
Wednesday, May 05, 2010
A Well-Rounded Life
I've been watching the first season of the TV series, In Treatment, on DVD. The main character, Paul, is in therapy with his wife, Kate. They've been married 20ish years, and are having marital problems. In the episode I watched this weekend, Kate told Paul that she didn't feel like she was living a "well-rounded life". She felt that she had lost herself, among the daily duties of wife and mother (I'm paraphrasing).
I feel this way sometimes. I feel like my life is heavy on taking care of others, and light on finding my own fulfillment. You can read my post on Housework, to understand why I don't really have hobbies. You can read my post on eyebrow waxing (It's the Little Things...), to know that the times I pamper myself are few and far between. But that's not what I'm talking about. I'm not talking about needing a break from my kids and household duties. I'm not even talking about finding time for myself. I'm talking about doing things that make me feel competent, and intelligent and necessary. I'm thankful that I'm able to stay home with my kids. I love them, and most of the time I love being with them. I love my husband an immeasurable amount. Most days, I'm proud to be the wife and mother that I am, but I do want to have an identity beyond that. I want to be more well-rounded. Is that possible in this stage of life?
How do you do it? If you're a stay-at-home mom, how do you do it? What do you do to bring fulfillment to your life? If you're a working mom, how do you do it? How do you bring balance to your life? I'd love to hear from you -- all of you -- to know what works for you. How do you stay centered and how do you stay in touch with yourself?
I feel this way sometimes. I feel like my life is heavy on taking care of others, and light on finding my own fulfillment. You can read my post on Housework, to understand why I don't really have hobbies. You can read my post on eyebrow waxing (It's the Little Things...), to know that the times I pamper myself are few and far between. But that's not what I'm talking about. I'm not talking about needing a break from my kids and household duties. I'm not even talking about finding time for myself. I'm talking about doing things that make me feel competent, and intelligent and necessary. I'm thankful that I'm able to stay home with my kids. I love them, and most of the time I love being with them. I love my husband an immeasurable amount. Most days, I'm proud to be the wife and mother that I am, but I do want to have an identity beyond that. I want to be more well-rounded. Is that possible in this stage of life?
How do you do it? If you're a stay-at-home mom, how do you do it? What do you do to bring fulfillment to your life? If you're a working mom, how do you do it? How do you bring balance to your life? I'd love to hear from you -- all of you -- to know what works for you. How do you stay centered and how do you stay in touch with yourself?
Monday, May 03, 2010
The Amazing Race
Brent and Caite, really? I CANNOT believe they are in the finals (much less that they won the last leg!). Does Caite really think that her time on AR has proven that she's intelligent? Since when does the ability to "read maps" make you a intellectual? And did you hear Brent this week say, "These people don't even know their own language." Wow! At least my favorite team, Jet and Cord, are still around. And as a person who has a dream of one day competing on AR, I'm happy for Jordan, who, with the help of his brother, Dan, is making his own AR dream come true! Here's hoping the Cowboys can pull this one off!
Sunday, May 02, 2010
It's the little things in life....
Thursday I went and had my eyebrows done. Waxed eyebrows are one of those little things in life that can make a huge difference on my entire outlook. With three kids, it has definitely turned into a luxury! It's not that big of a deal, really. I just have to go to Beauty Brands, sit for 10 minutes and then pay $12. The big catch is that it's most certainly not the kind of thing that I can do with a 2 year old in tow. I would also not head out to Beauty Brands in the evening after the kids are in bed. "See ya, Honey. I know we haven't seen each other today, but I'm off to get my eyebrows waxed." (There are other things I do in the evenings, and he does too, but somehow getting my eyebrows done doesn't really seem THAT important!) Mary goes to the sitter one morning a week, and that would be the perfect time, but I usually have so many other things to try to accomplish in those three hours. So, the eyebrows never take priority. But I'm telling you, when I get them done -- 10 minutes and $12 later -- I feel like a new woman. Does anyone else feel that way? I look in the mirror and I wonder why I didn't do it two weeks sooner. When, in so many ways, your life does not seem like your own, taking the time to do a little something that is luxurious can go a LONG way!
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