When we first moved into our condo (last month), I posted a status update on Facebook about how much I missed my DirecTV and DVR. Watching local channels, without the possibility of pausing or forwarding through commercials was just too much for me. One of my friends commented in response to this complaint, "These are the kinds of problems to have!" And I thought, "Isn't that the truth? How lucky am I, and yet I complain?"
For the last few weeks, through the postings of a Facebook friend, I have been following and praying for the precious little life of Baby Ewan. His parents started a blog (http://www.team-ewan.com), documenting Ewan's fight for life. He was born with a heart problem. His mom, Kirsten, explains that, "Ewan has been diagnosed with a congenital heart defect called Tetralogy of Fallot with Pulmonary Atresia, which consists of a combination of four defects in the heart. It is estimated that Tetralogy of Fallot occurs in as many as 5 out of every 10,000 births. There are several forms of Tetralogy of Fallot that range in severity. Ewan is diagnosed with the most severe form." Each day he lived was a miracle, but also wrought with pain for Baby Ewan and his family.
Ewan went to heaven on October 3rd. As I read Ewan's mom's daily account of happenings in his life, and then her varied responses to the loss of him (which you can read here and here), I began to think about my own blog (this blog)! When thinking about the posts I've written lately, I couldn't help but think, "These are the kinds of problems to have." Somehow the fact that I am not in a book club seems almost laughably unimportant. If the only thing I have to say goodbye to is my house, I am amazingly fortunate! And I know that Kirsten would give anything for Ewan to be two like Mary. You get where I'm going with this. Problems, schmoblems! Really!
So I've thought long and hard about what I should do. I decided that I'm not going to stop writing this Mommy-with-a-Masters-themed blog, even with the relatively unimportant worries and complaints that I have. The writing is good for me. There are times, too, when I feel like the things that I say resonate with others in a way that is helpful. But, in honor of Baby Ewan, I will forever go forth with a different perspective. I want all of you who read this blog to know that I will try very hard not to take myself, or my issues, too seriously. From now on, I'm going to double my efforts at being deeply and completely thankful for my dear children. I will hold them closer and love on them more. I will cherish these moments and days, because there may come a time when I have them no more. And I will pray. I will pray for Ewan; his parents, Kirsten and James; and all who know and love them. I will pray for all children who are sick, and those who are dying, and for the friends and families that love and care for them. I will pray for all who have lost children and loved ones. I will pray for myself, for my husband and for my kids. And I will pray for you!
For now I'm thankful that my problems are the kind that are desirable, but I know that this can change in an instant. I encourage each of you to pull your loved ones closer today, and make sure that each day ends with the satisfaction of a life well-lived through people deeply-loved.