You've heard this expression, right? "Every woman needs a wife." I believe it's never more true than during this time of year. Oh, if I just had a wife to help me through the holiday season!! Can I hear an "Amen" here?
Here's the thing about December: until the week before Christmas, nothing that is on the regular weekly schedule actually stops to make room for all the extra holiday stuff! We still go to soccer practice, Kumon, Kid's Quest at church, etc. The kids still have homework and spelling words. Not to mention the fact that the family still needs to eat, wear clean clothes and live in a somewhat clean environment. Right? So where is the time to help the kids make their Christmas lists and then send them to family? When do I shop for the exact gifts the kids want and then hide them until it's time to wrap them (also my job)? How am I suppose to shop for and mail gifts to out-of-town folks? What about the baking and food prep?
Do you see where I'm headed with this? A wife would be a great addition to the month of December. The amount of babysitting I need to accommodate all the parties and activities, alone, could keep my wife busy 1) taking care of the kids or 2) booking the sitters! Splitting everything with a wife would make the work manageable, don't you think? She could drive the kids around town to their activities, and I could hit the mall (and I haven't even discussed the time it takes to make a list, figure out which store coupons I have and can use, plan my trips according to which stores are close together so I can accomplish more with each outing, etc...). While I baked, she could load the dishwasher and wipe down the countertops (or vice versa, honestly, I'd clean if she wanted to bake!). She could make the trips to the post office, or just sit in the car with the kids so I wouldn't have to get them all out. And she could definitely help keep the kids from finding their gifts, and help me remember which wrapping paper is used for "Santa gifts" and which is safe for regular presents. (Maybe, just maybe, she'd also be really good at making chocolate martinis, for those nights when even two moms didn't feel like enough!!)
Ah, a wife, just what I need this Christmas, but she'd have to be free, of course, because who can afford to PAY for help in December???